The happiest day of my life was when I found out I was pregnant with him. I always wanted to be a mother but for various reasons it didn’t happen for a long time. I remember when I turned 38 and was recently divorced, I asked a friend if there was any chance I would have a child. He told me he thought I could and that I had a four-year window. It didn’t seem possible then but I went on to have two children- one at 41 and one at 43.
When I met Lee, I immediately loved him but I didn’t think we could be a match because he was 21 years older than me and already had three children- two adults and one teen-ager. I was surprised and thrilled when he said he would have children again with me. It didn’t take long before we married.
But I didn’t become pregnant immediately. I started to worry that I had let my fertility pass me by. I researched the best times to conceive, I went to a doctor for advice, I went under hypnosis, but months passed by and nothing. I turned 40 and didn’t feel like celebrating. I couldn’t believe that I might never be a mother. Lee told me not to worry – that there was a magic to conceiving and that it didn’t just happen when you wanted it to.
We went to a workshop about fertility treatments. They told us the chances of success for women my age to conceive with their assistance was very low- if I remember right, under 20 percent. Plus it would cost something like $20,000 for the full IVF treatment. We crossed that off the list and took some meetings with adoption agencies.
Then I decided to get acupuncture. Through research on the Internet, I found a local Chinese acupuncturist who had had success with helping women over 40 conceive. He told me he thought it would take four treatments- one a month for $40 a treatment. After the fourth treatment, I was overjoyed when my home pregnancy test turned up positive.
My son Theo has been everything I’ve hoped for. He has had a sense of humor since he was a tiny infant. I remember him giggling long and hard when he was only a few months old. He still laughs all the time. He loves music and will listen intently to every musician who performs on the street or plays at the farmers market. He is full of questions about everything- what causes lightning, whether the sky is hard, where moose sleep.
We celebrated his birthday by going to Green Canyon Hot Springs- an old-school pool facility with a large shallow kid-friendly pool filled with warm water. He happily floated on his arm floats with me while his younger brother snoozed in the car with dad. Afterwards, we had lunch and cake at a Mexican restaurant with two outdoor bouncy houses. It was a great day for a great boy.